This time is unlike any other. Within a few days, our world went from being your regular every day activities to being stuck in our homes 24/7. As adults we had to make quick decisions to figure it all out but as children they didn’t have much input. They lost their school relationships, their friends, their structure and their normalcy. Parents have tried really hard to make it all seem okay.
What we need to remember and allow is our child to process their feelings. It is okay for this to not feel great. It is okay for this to be disappointing and frustrating. Recognizing these feelings may be hard for a child but talking about it will help children to know that it is normal to have these feelings. Let them see that you are frustrated by this as well.
Our parenting coach Hilary Diouf, uses Positive Discipline techniques to help parents to see the underlying motivations behind a child’s behaviours. When children are not able to express how they are feeling sometimes they act out or display it in other ways such as feeling unwell. Recognizing the motivation can help parents to develop strategies that can help their children thrive. Hilary is amazing at helping you work through this specific to your child.
Another aspect of this shift in a child’s life is the lack of routine. Laurie Santos, Professor of Psychology at Yale, highlighted in her course The Science of Well Being that routine and structure is often what our brain and body crave. This creates a sense of purpose, accomplishment and organization in a relatively disorganized space in the world. What type of structure or routine is good for your child is dependent on your child’s needs. Do they have a lot of energy? Do they seem to lack energy? Looking at your child’s needs and matching it with a schedule including
Where do you begin? Acknowledging with children that it is okay to not be okay. Start the conversation on what ideas they have to make sense of it all. Give them a sense of structure and routine. Need help figuring this out for your child, reach out and speak with an Occupational Therapist or a parenting support worker. You don’t need to do this alone. We can help.
